Thursday, September 30

A prayer (and a request) for today

[click the image for larger]

I am reading this prayer in tomorrow's podcast, and it's completely on topic, with the totally-serious caveat that here at Blue Gal, we believe that God loves atheists best.

I'm holding a fundraiser, asking my readers to give five bucks, either to the podcast or to me. I'm so grateful for your (please keep it modest in these tough times) support of my writing and broadcasting. Your small contribution makes it possible for me to keep toner in my printer and occasionally say yes to a treat for the kids. Thank you.

Wednesday, September 29

What Joe Biden thinks of me is none of my business.

or, as Aspie blogger Atrios (God love him) put it...

If Joe Biden thinks it's time for us liberal bloggers to say to their readers, 'go out and vote for the Democrat of your choice but for God's sake defeat the tea party crazees.'...

Dear Readers of Blue Gal, go out and vote for the Democrat of your choice but for God's sake defeat the tea party crazees.


And now I'll go off and criticize the President for saying it's okay to execute a US citizen without a trial. That he's not doing enough regarding gay rights. And that the Democratic Congress is wimpy, and Senate rules have made that chamber a complete joke.


I am not obsessed with "making a difference in Washington." My job as a blogger is simply to write the truth as I see it, back it up, fight the good fight, and not get distracted by personalities and artificial drama.

I'm amused that any White House official is obsessed with whether their base appreciates them enough. That's a sign that they know they haven't lived up to their own principles. (pssst. There's still time.)

I'm disappointed that so many bloggers have taken the bait. That's a sign that they don't know their own influence and strength. (pssst. There's still time.)

I've been agitated by our very own noise machine, and discouraged and depressed by the current economic depression. Then I tell myself, with optimism that often is my only true friend, that this too shall pass. You know how I know that? Because change is the only constant, folks. Keep the faith.

Tuesday, September 28

It seems the Senate has gone comPLETEly irrelevant, I mus' say!

And give me a break!  The only reason Jim DeMint is shutting down the US Senate is so he can beat Sarah Palin and Mike Pence in Iowa, I mus' say!   Thanks for letting him, 60 seat majority.

Waiting for the next headline:  "Liberal Base to Biden:  Stop Talking."  It could happen!

Ed Grimley always cheers me up:

If you're on Facebook

Please go "like" the Newt Inauguration photoshop I posted to Wonkette's photoshop contest.  I don't expect there are prizes involved, but I'll share all my non-existent Mafia Wars points with you.  Thanks.

Monday, September 27

I gotta hand it to the ABC make up artists.

Cool how they made Bristol Palin look older than her mom.

Banned Books Week

Does anyone have a photograph of Sarah Palin or any other tea party associate reading an actual book? Please send it to bluegalsblog AT gmail.

Don't have a lot of hope there.

Signing that book she didn't write doesn't count.

Batocchio sent the podcast the following hilarious fake quotes:

"All the cool bloggers are celebrating Banned Books Week." - Mark Twain

"Every time a child reads a book, it makes Sarah Palin cry." - Kurt Vonnegut

"If Christine O'Donnell read more, she might not be so fucking dumb, and vice versa." - Dorothy Parker

Responding to a few emails

I've had a few emails lately with general questions...just a quick update for new readers and those who emailed. Thank you for writing.

Friday, September 24

What Stephen Colbert did today.... sit with Bobby Kennedy and Cesar Chavez and make people aware of just how much cheap lettuce costs all of us.

In drag.

And Michelle Malkin and Chuck Todd and all the right wing panties twisters and inside the beltway propriety fetishists can kiss his ass. How many people watched this guerrilla theater on CSpan-effing-3 this morning and heard about the United Farm Workers? And if it's such a crucial hearing, Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee (D of Texas), how 'bout getting off your fatass Blackberry texting while the testimony is going on? Everybody saw that shit.

Regarding Blanche Lincoln, Blue Gal gets her cuss on.

Thanks again to Frank Chow for the graphic and Heather at Crooks and Liars Video Cafe for their help.

The button below allows listeners to throw a contribution specifically towards the podcast. Thanks for your listenership and support! We really appreciate it:

Wednesday, September 22

What's your alternative Donald Rumsfeld book cover?

Just a quick n' dirty to get everyone started.  The real one is here.  Have fun, photoshop the hell out of it, post it to your blog, let me know in comments.  The winner gets a "Vituperative foul-mouthed blogger of the Left" mug from my Cafe Press store.

You've got until this post rolls off the page.  I'm the judge and jury.  Good luck!

Tuesday, September 21

Friday, September 17

God, Sex, and it's open (satire) season on Calista Gingrich! (Podcast)

Thanks again to Frank Chow for the graphic and Heather at Crooks and Liars Video Cafe for their help.

The button below allows listeners to throw a contribution specifically towards the podcast. Thanks for your listenership and support! We really appreciate it:

PS h/t to Bob who corrected us:

Obama's book is Dreams from my Father.
McCain's book is Faith of my Father.

Wednesday, September 15

I love @Wonkette to pieces, BUT.....

I love Wonkette.  Ken Layne is wonderful.   But Ken honey, if you're going to do a post on why you did a photoshop of Christine O'Donnell, you need to do more than post her head on the poster and call it a day.

I say this with love.    Give her a modest bustline, watch the neck length (she's not Audrey Hepburn) and modify the lighting.

And Wonkette, I'd be happy to be your artist-in-residence for a price.

PS. I don't think whether this candidate is a virgin or not is an issue. Her attempt to convert others, particularly gays, to her bigoted patriarchal vision of sexuality, IS.

Add it all together you've got Teabircher!

Dick Armey plus The Flying Nun equals Christine O'Donnell.

And yeah, NIXON is rolling over in his grave.

Update.  There is something so very wrong here. 

No.  I'm not going to photoshop it.  But I saved it!  You betcha!  

Tuesday, September 14

The real reason Mike Castle lost tonight?

Crazy Eileen!

I really wonder if Christine Dontrubyourself is a birther, or is willing to alienate the birthers before November 2. The dems need to bring that up.

Castle DARED to say the President is an American Citizen. And he's out.

I fear for your souls, Delaware Republicans.

At this point, the Tea Party is a Disney Cartoon.

Clockwise from top left:  Sarah Palin, Dick Armey, Michele Bachmann, Glenn Beck, and Sharron Angle as Cruella deVille.  Click image above for larger; original house of villains here.

Monday, September 13

Karma, Newt. Karma.

And trust me, Newt, when the white-bread right of center Christian Science Monitor asks if you went too far, you did.

UPDATE: I see MorningJoe is not amused. How long before Joe goes full David Frum on us? How long after that will he unblock us on Twitter?

Friday, September 10

Mrs. Callista Gingrich. I'm grabbing you by the short hairs on your crotch and swinging you around my head forever.

h/t Heather for the video. After many struggles concerning whether you as a family member are "an issue" and "fair game" in the battles against your horrible horrible husband, you've convinced me.

You're an issue. You're very much fair game. And you are far more dangerous than just "blow job queen wife number 3" (copyright Tengrain)

Our Regular Weekly Podcast - Can Obama Get His Groove Back?

Thanks again to Frank Chow for the graphic and Heather at Crooks and Liars Video Cafe for their help.

The button below allows listeners to throw a contribution specifically towards podcasting costs. Thanks for your listenership and support! We really appreciate it:

Thursday, September 9

The Daley Show? (Bonus Podcast on Mayor Daley)

We couldn't let the week go by without podcasting about da mare.  We've got another podcast coming up tomorrow (whew.)

We appreciate your contributions and emails. More info on how to support the podcast at our website. Thanks!

Wednesday, September 8

My 11 yo's "about me" letter

Dear [teacher's name]
My dad is almost 70 and served in the Cold War.  My mom is 46, but she looks like she's 30.  My first sister (8) is 1% annoying. My younger sister (6) is 10,000% annoying. My gerbil, Awesome, is amazing.
I like the computer.  My favorite TV show is MSNBC Countdown with KO.  I like reading a whole lot.  I like Diary of a Wimpy Kid.  

It's all true (my ex and I are that far apart in age, though Junior shaved a year off of mine-- GOOD BOY!). Junior Dude has to do his homework if he wants to watch "Worst Persons."   Keith's book "Pitchforks and Torches" comes out five days after Dude's b-day--we'll have to make it a belated gift.

I hate to admit it, but I think he's got the annoying sister ratio about right, too.

Tuesday, September 7

Shock. Mayor Daley not running for re-election?

The story is still sketchy, and I'm sure

certain Chicago bloggers 

will have more to say soon. now.  All I have to say is that when you're Daley, there are no personal reasons.   Dis guy has forever been "La ville, c'est moi."  if ya know what I mean.

Oh well.

Lil' Ricky has a lil' problemo

Via @DavidCornDC, we find out that if Rick Santorum is going to run for President, he'll have to deal with the fact that Google thinks his name, as coined by Dan Savage and "spread" everywhere, means "sperm plus poop plus lubricant".  Unless you're Nancy Elliott, R-NH, who simplified the recipe when she argued against same-gender marriage:

This video is not safe for work, because Nancy is SUCH a smut mouth.

PS Along the same lines, don't miss the lovely Zina Saunders's lovely work related to Ricky's problem.

Arianna Huffington, Mary Matalin Together at Last on the Radio

Click image for larger, original painting and background info, worth the click, here.

As a rule, I don't take the name of my Christian wayshower in vain.

But Jesu Christi.

Not satisfied to armpit fuck Newt Gingrich, Arianna Huffington now co-stars with Mary Matalin on, um, Progressive? Radio?

THE Mary Matalin?  The Mary Matalin who lies professionally for Dick Cheney, endorsed slapping female employees in political campaigns, and whose "imprint" at Simon and Schuster is responsible for

Karl Rove's memoir
Pam Geller's "book"
"Young Guns" (yeah)
and let's not forget....

I don't deny anyone the right to make a living.  But Arianna Huffington is not making a living sharing a platform with this POS.  Arianna at some point was supposed to be a progressive, and now we see that's bullshit.  NO progressive would enable Mary Matalin to come back week after week and just make stuff up, which is what Mary Matalin does.  Lady McCheney? It takes a really big liar to get Don Imus to wonder ALOUD if you have some sort of lying disease.

I don't expect or ask anything of Matalin.  She's beyond help.

But clearly, Arianna doesn't need the money, she needs the attention and celebrity hobnobbing.  It's a disgusting stripping of the illusion that you were EVER one of us, Ms. Huffpo.

Monday, September 6

Happy Labor Day

And a song of support for those who are looking for work. Billy Bragg FTW. xoxo

Friday, September 3

Our Weekly Podcast - The Professional Left

We appreciate contributions to keep our podcast going. Thanks!

[many thanks to Frank Chow for his photoshop header]

Thursday, September 2

I'm shocked, shocked I tell you!

To discover that within the privacy of their own home, Mr and ex-Governor Palin comport themselves as small-minded, self-centered, foul-mouthed White Trash.
clipped from
In whatever remains of Palin’s inner circle, however, most people are following orders. Some details of the Palins’ private life, however, suggest a reality at odds with Sarah’s image.
One person who has been a frequent houseguest of the Palins’ says that the couple began many mornings with screaming fights, a fusillade of curses: “ ‘Fuck you,’ ‘Fuck this,’ ‘You lazy piece of shit.’ ‘You’re fuckin’ lucky to have me,’ Sarah would always say.”
Sometimes the children rebelled. A campaign aide remembers that one of the Palin children found her mother’s public displays of piety especially grating. Though Palin prayed and read the Bible every night, aides never saw the family join her for devotionals. “You’re just putting on a show. You’re so fake,” one of the children said when Palin made a point of praying in front of other people. “This is not who you are. Why are you pretending to be something you’re not?”
blog it

Wednesday, September 1

Hopefully, by now, you've all seen the upgrade over at Crooks and Liars.

It looks really nice. So proud to be a part of that great blog.

So Obama forgives Bush?

That's damn Christian of him.   Oops.

And not to agree with the whole of his speech, but he is a better speaker than Beck n' Boehner combined.   'Specially Boehner.

Best knitting gadget ever.

They're stitch markers.  If you've ever knit an "Oh, Shit" sweater, you get it.   From here.