‘Vasectomy Housing’ Surges as New Jersey Tax Remedy
Turns out it is so "expensive" (seriously, don't get me started) to educate a child in New Jersey that the "solution" is to deny housing permits to builders who are NOT EXCLUDING CHILDREN from their "lifestyle communities."
Hands on knees, breathe in, breathe out. I've been doing it all day.
With the cost of educating a child in New Jersey’s public schools averaging $12,567 a year, the highest in the nation and more than double the property tax parents typically pay, local governments in the state are pursing age-restricted housing to expand the tax base without the expense of higher enrollment.
Nationwide, 2.8 million households were part of age-restricted communities in 2005, up 29% from 2001. The number in New Jersey grew 37% in the same period. More than half the housing units started in the state in the past two years have excluded children... [emphasis mine, do you mind?]
Developers, who can make more money building unrestricted housing, sometimes find it’s more difficult to get those plans approved, said Patrick O’Keefe, chief executive officer of the [New Jersey homebuilder's] association. “It’s almost a prerequisite that a project pass the child-exclusion test before a planning board will consider it,” he said.
The nation's leading builder of McMansion lifestyle communities, Toll Brothers, lists six "community types" they offer at their website: Luxury Home, Future, Active Lifestyle, Golf, Resort, and Urban Living. While they mention "single family" homes, anything in New Jersey under three hundred thousand (and there ain't much) is two bedroom only. But hey, nice to see with the "Active Lifestyle" community types they're also excluding the Depends and Wheelchair demographic. Equal housing and all that shit.
Here's an entryway from the Toll Brothers website, which I have taken the liberty of labelling as more child-friendly to meet the needs of my ever-expanding "lifestyle":
1. Kiwi-Strawberry Go-Gurt stain (dry)
2. Toaster Waffle from Sunday under stairs
3. Rounded toddler-poop in sunken bath (Cheese Puff Edition)
4. Play Doh enhanced Leather Sofa
5. Many designer options here: Dora doll, hot wheels car, abandoned Slinky, ballerina shoe. - contact home
6. "Special home for Barbie" in fireplace - Standard
7. Designer Custom kitchen smells like chicken (nuggets). Fingerprints standard.
8. Ersatz "washable" crayon available at extra cost - contact home
Impact on city council revenue: Negative
Impact of educated parents raising educated children on our society: Priceless
If there weren't certain New Jersey teachers actually teaching out there...oops, sorry they're busy with NCLB testing, nevermind.