Thursday, November 15

Don't leave the house without....

So last night I got about five hours of sleep and I had hopes that after the kids were off to school, I could get some more.

Got the kids dressed and figgered, I'm not gonna get dressed. I'm just taking 5yo into her carpool, I don't have to get out of the car, I'm wearing a shirt that covers everything, etc.

So we get stuck behind an accident on Hwy 31 for 20 MINUTES. We're all of a sudden...late. I have to "check in" the 5yo.

I have to walk into her Episcopal Day School, which happens to be attached to the Cathedral, wearing nothing but black lacy camisole and soft knit pants with lace around the bottom. I'm also wearing athletic socks and my walking shoes, and a blue man's shirt, which, yeah, does cover a multitude of sins but still.

My only option is to totally bluff my way in. Big smile, hold my daughter's hand and take proud strides as long as my short legs will carry me....

Oops, I'm not wearing a bra. Long strides make me bounce, big time. Nix that.

Of course, there is the "running-late mom uniform" -- usually sweatpants and no makeup, which is basically what I had on, but even when I'm running late I manage to put on a damn brassiere. This was just hubris, plain and simple.

I've learned my lesson. Next time I'll wear these:


  1. now that brings back memories!

  2. Funny, it is Pajama Day at my sons' school today. Too bad that wasn't universal. Should be a paid holiday.

  3. Anonymous12:25 PM

    Been there !

    Do we get a prize now ?

  4. Anonymous12:52 PM

    Many are the days when I've left the house without my brassiere, thinking no one would notice...

  5. I need that "Safety Girl" lunch box!

  6. Oh my oh my... I just see you striding in there with your head held high as it were just another day!

    And the "Safety Girl" lunchbox looks very fun.

  7. Ah, the things we wear when we're sure we'll be invisible.


  8. Anonymous8:05 PM

    Never fails, does it?

    I'm right there with you.

    Everytime I think about just jumping in the car sans bra for the a.m. dropoff, I stop and think....why is it that every time I'm running late, I get caught behind granny who's driving the grandkids to school even though she can't find her glasses and can barely find the gas pedal?

    Murphy's Law?

  9. dressing well is so very important though..... here are some tips: link

  10. Anonymous8:49 PM

    A true mommy blogging experience. Dooce, watch out!

  11. Anonymous11:13 PM

    My days as a corporate trainer had some unusual dressing problems. There was the time the flight was rough and the dinner splattered all over me, and of course the airline lost my luggage.

    I got to the hotel room and sent my clothes to the laundry (which also promptly lost them), and I ended up teaching my class wearing the hotel bathrobe, a bathing suit (it was in my carryon), and boots.

    Don't ask me how, but I got the best evaluations on that trip.



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  13. Duh. Leave a nearly-had-it bra and a lousy pair of jeans in the car. Teach your daughters the fine and lively art of putting a bra on without getting undressed on top (a useful life skill, really)

    Or just stop caring! Honey, if you lived HERE, no one would notice you were wearing PJs...

    Backup plan - pretend you have a really bad cold as you walk her in. Explains both the lateness AND the pjs. Just grab a Kleenex (you do have Kleenex in the car, right? And you call yourself a mommy...) and shove it in front of your face and make snuffling noises periodically.

    The powers that be will think "oh, that poor thing" and offer to drive your daughter home and bring you soup. Hey, it could work.

  14. Anonymous4:58 AM

    Re: the bounce, is it the aesthetic effect or the dire risk of a black eye? Cheers.


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