Christian and American and never the two....

...shall meet.



[Image stolen from Bay of Fundie, the latest addition to the BG blogroll. Can't have too many smart funny athiests around here, 'specially those who highlight the laffs coming from the Creationist Museum.]

Driftglass:

...around a quarter of our fellow citizens are intractably Sieg-Heiliotropic** and as such are fundamentally and permanently unfit to be Americans.

**ah that Drifty with his Googlewhacks.


I’m not going to go all Anne Frank on you. I don’t think we humans are essentially good or evil. We’re human. We eat too much, buy stuff we don’t need, scream at our kids, run red lights, and send ten dollars to help a homeless kitten while walking by homeless people every day on the way to our urgent and meaningless morning-long meeting with sociopathic Powerpointers. [busted that googlewhack baby]

And which of us are “fit” to be Americans? I would argue for disqualification of anyone who can identify Simon Cowell, and that makes me unfit, as well.

But Drifty's post got me thinking a lot about what makes us fit Americans and also what makes those of us who choose to do so, to be fit Christians. Being worthy of either name is a tough task. The self-proclaimed U.S. leadership (since I will never accept that W. was actually elected) corrupts the word patriot. And the church as embodied by Falwell, Dobson, and the majority of voters in the county where I currently live, really truly falls short of any rationally arrived-to definition of “follower of Jesus.”

Interestingly enough, the reason the so-called Christians make such lousy so-called Americans is because they have no understanding of God. The only compassion their god shows, if you believe the Christian Right’s agitprop, is for the unborn, and occasionally far-off orphans.

They don’t get it.

Their god is, again, with the exception of the unborn white baby, a god of privileged power and angry vengeance. He (yup) is a god of the death penalty. A god of No New Taxes. A god of Not in My Backyard. The god of white middle-class comfort trumps all other political goals or social rationales that would require us to be compassionate for those Jesus called upon us to love.

It’s like that fortune cookie game where you read the fortune and add “in bed”? To really understand the typical whitebread Christian, take a Bible verse, particularly a command from our Lord Jesus Christ, and add the words “ but at the mall” to the end:

Love your enemies… but at the mall.

Read this poem, or better yet let Garrison Keillor read it to you:



Harvey Wasserman said it best a couple years ago:

One major reason Benjamin Franklin, George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Tom Paine, Ethan Allen and the vast majority of early Americans rejected the merger of church and state was the lingering stench of Puritan intolerance. The infamous theocratic murders of the Salem witch trials sickened the American soul, just as today's power grab by Karl Rove's new corporate fundamentalists creates an atmosphere of intolerance and fear, defined by the world's largest prison gulag.

It's a witch trial, people. We're the good Christians, and they are witches. Burn them, hang them, and praise YOURSELF that you so clearly serve the one true God.



See, as long as you don't have to take your faith into the private sphere of your youporn bookmark or airport bathroom stall, you can still vote for the candidate with the loudest "protect the unborn" blowhorn, step on the Bad Arabs [ooh let's use a big word like Islamofascist 'cause it makes us look, you know, intellectual], and feel you are a good Christian.

yeah I did link Pammy (first and probably last time ever) to the word "intellectual" 'cause I'm feeling a little silly/giddy today. My apologies to anyone who actually clicks the link. John! Bolton!

Rot in hell? Nah. My prayer, really, is that those bland blind proclaimers of Jesus yet deniers of Christ should rot in their own mindset. That is more punishment than I could ever wish on anyone, and I'm too sad and sorry and...

My favorite Bible verse? John 11:35, "Jesus wept." And he's weeping now over your fucking dumbass question, Tim.

I leave Saturday for a blogger meet-up sponsored by Americans United for the Separation of Church and State / First Freedom First. I'll be meeting with science bloggers, atheist bloggers, and a few Christian bloggers like myself. We all believe that the separation of church and state is critical to our national identity. And I believe that I cannot practice my faith in God or my patriotism as a citizen of the United States, without it.

We're citizens of the big wide world that God loves with all the love there is. Rock on folks:

Because I can.

As you know, I'm a brainy chick. But even brainy chicks can ask questions that really have no answer. Hit it, Audrey:

Things you already knew.

Tucker Carlson is a complete and utter tool. Is he hiding a ring gag in his mouth? He must swallow a hell of a lot of drool. Just saying.

Finally, yesterday's video blog

It's 18 minutes but I was on a roll. Too bad Google Videos was not. But finally....here 'tis. Some stories about education.



The Eclipse Program is typical of pre-school early intervention programs around the country.

More on Hoover High School football coach Rush Propst here.

John Archibald's terrific column on the Birmingham School system's "dropout factories" is here.

Salon tonight (wherein I blame the Matrix)

Blue Gal Salon November 5 hosted by blue.gal.

Join now

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Salon is open and I'll be there around 9 Eastern/8 Central and whatever savings time my computer set itself to.

I can't send the email file I wanted to get out and I can't post my vlog... The Matrix is sitting in my laptop's DVD drive. Coincidence? I think not. Plus, somebody's been watching it way too much.



Hope to see you tonight.

Couple quick things

The internet is a wonderful thing but sometimes it's not very "Way Opens" as we Quakers say.

We ARE having Salon tonight 9 Eastern 8 Central etc.

I tried to email a big file to a friend and the recipient's email doesn't like big files. I love big files. What gives?

The download of today's vlog is taking for EV-AH. I'll have it up asap.

So Google video says the vlog is downloaded and it doesn't appear and I cut the file in half to 12MG and it still won't go.

Time to sit back, give up, and try again tomorrow.

Blogenfreude has the flu. Go leave him some love where I cross-posted for him.

And for the love of God and all things holy do some voting today.



Lindsay Beyerstein - Majikthise over that wacky Glenn Reynolds for best individual blogger....

Crooks and Liars over Michelle Malkin for best video blog...

And Special K at the Democracy for America pulse poll. Today is the LAST day for that one.

Lesson before the fall?

I served in a church nursery this morning and some children and I worked on this exact jigsaw puzzle:



And the whole time we're putting together this fairly easy 100 piece puzzle I'm cracking up at the theological lesson not contained therein. Thank God I didn't have to teach them anything beyond let's do the edge pieces first.

Sorry for the extra late post I was needed at a bigger blog today. Not that that's any excuse.

And I was so busy thinking about my video blog for tomorrow I drove to the grocery store without my purse this afternoon. Must be the circadian rhythm thing.

BTW you have probably seen this but I love that teh internets allow an artist with this kind of talent and cleverness to get his artwork 1.5 million views in six days. Dang good.

Saturday Song

Lie down, stretch out, and get lost in it, ma hunnies.

Anger Management

Okay deep, cleansing breath. Because we bloggers are very good at venting our anger. We rage against injustice, rant about the crimes of the current world order, and add a heigh-ho and hearty fuck you (tm) to anyone who disagrees.

It didn't help my mood, not a bit, that Halloween morning I walked into the local public school of two of my three children, to find a grown woman wearing (supposedly for Halloween, but still) a miniskirted Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz costume. It turns out every third grade teacher was dressed in a Wizard of Oz costume (my son's teacher was Glinda) but I suspect Dorothy there was the only one who got her costume clicking on a sidebar ad at some spank-my-ass chat room. But I digress.

No, what really got my goat was the editorial earlier this week in the NYFT about "Honey, I shrunk the Congress." It's a good editorial as good editorials go, arguing for the restoration of checks and balances and that Congress is EQUAL to the Executive in terms of constitutional power and well, why don't they "act as if" for a while so that maybe someday they won't feel like complete frauds for overriding a veto?

What made me raging mad was this passage:

Right now, standing up for Congress may appeal more to Democrats than Republicans. The issue of reining in presidential power is beginning to gain traction among conservatives, however, as they contemplate the possibility of a Democrat — particularly Hillary Clinton — as president.

Okay I'm so over getting angry every time I see her name in print. What ticks me off is that our Constitution, like everything else inside the greasy DC Beltway (I'll be there next weekend for a blogger meet-up, be warned) is now just one more political football that is fine for a doormat at my house but not at yours.

And then there's Mukasey and the waterboarding thing. It's not about waterboarding, but kudos to the committee members who made it about that. The ploy, which allows you Democrats to seem reasonable and prudent with your colleagues across the aisle, seems to have worked. The problem, gentlemen and a few ladies, is that those across the aisle need to be removed from office for...oh nevermind.

Here's my sense of what is called for in terms of collegiality: if Mukasey or any other suited twit wore his candy cock ring into my senate Judiciary Committee meeting and started spouting trash about the Constitutional provisions that George Bush has thought such an inconvenience, providing my committee patient assurance that, in the legal opinion of many well-regarded blind fascists, the President can legally do whatever the fuck he wants, this is the reception he'd get:



Have a nice day!

Something is wrong...

I couldn't find Bill Murray in, which movie was it, Stripes? Saying, "something is WRONG here. Something is SERIOUSLY WRONG here."

Listen to this short news piece aired on NPR this morning. It's about the FBI's investigation of Blackwater in Iraq.

The correspondent is NPR's "resident FBI expert." And part of the problem, for sure, is that she talks to us about FBI investigations like we've never watched a Harrison Ford cop movie, or even an old Bond movie, not to mention a single episode of CSI-Kokomo, ever.

Gee whiz, these FBI agents investigate crimes after they happen. And they use more gee whiz technology that is garnished from surveyors equipment...

Yeah, the part about re-enacting Blackwater's crimes into a computer simulated "video game" in order to investigate gave me the creeps too, 'specially since the killer in this instance is a gang of hired thugs paid for by OUR Defense Department:

But maybe what's really bothering me is that this story makes it seem as though someone is actually doing something about Blackwater when we all know that's bullshit.

Go Say Hi

...to FOBG Commandante Agi's latest group blog venture, The Guys from Area 51. Basically, if Agi and Frederick do it? It's blogrolled here. That is all.

Happy Halloween

Sometimes!?! (Thanks to Paul the Spud of Shakes for the pic.) And remember ma hunnies, there is more than one way to cook a pumpkin. And this is one of my favorite Cake songs to dance around the house to.

Tit for Tat

Several people have told me I just need to embrace the whole Tina Fey thing. Your challenge, should you choose to accept it, is to photoshop this image and show me how.

BLACKWATER:

It's okay, Blackwater isn't getting special treatment...Bushco wants the bad Arabs at Gitmo to have immunity from prosecution, too.

And then there's the Telecoms. Blek.


LAST NIGHT'S SALON:

Sorry guys, somebody already did Hatebook. I don't know why we didn't look it up last night. But it's still a great idea. And we did run with it. Thanks.

And yeah, then we discussed Pammy. (Thanks Morse) I woke up this morning happy and refreshed and I STILL can't figure out how she can't know what this looks like, except she's been hypnotized by John Bolton.

Salon tonight 9 Eastern

Blue Gal's Salon October 29 hosted by blue.gal.

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Blue Gal Vlog 10/29

A little unusual vlog I'm having trouble sleeping this morning and have a day away from computer to look forward to, so no time like the present, etc. First vid is me looking tired and talking hoarse (yeah Dad you don't have to worry about too much makeup in this one, but dang girl you need to stop sleepin' in your earrings) but it's short, explains where I was yesterday afternoon, and the second video. which is not me, is more about the exhibit I attended. It's 5:15 long, and if you haven't seen it I hope you will watch.

Mark your calendars

It's 37 Days Until Zappadan. And Paul wants to know which musician is John The Baptist to Frank Zappa's, well, maybe we're taking the whole religiousity of this holiday a little too seriously. But if you have a thought leave it over at Paul's post so we can keep 'em together. I have always appreciated Frank more as a political philosopher than as a musician, but here he Done Good. In fact, lovely.

Intelligent thinking on Intelligent Design

[Okay once again I have my limits as to images I will or will not post but I have to admit about the one that will appear when you click here? I did laugh. A lot.]

Ha. From the Quaker pages of Beliefnet.

According to Wikipedia the controversy centres around the following issues:
1/ Whether Intelligent Design can be regarded as science.
2/ Whether the evidence supports Intelligent Design.
3/ Whether teaching Intelligent Design is appropriate.

My position on these is:
1/ No.
2/ No.
3/ No.

Yup.

More cool religious links. (Yes, religion can be cool!)

Thorsmark has the best lengthy description of what blogs are and why they matter that I've ever read. Start halfway down the post under the heading, "Why should we care about blogs?"

The wonderful blog The Revealer tells us that once again, the claims that the religious right are dead are, well, overstated to say the least.

Love this [click image for larger]:

Sometimes I wonder....

How the hell can the MSM have a hundred articles on Miss England being too thin to win Miss World and not one on why is the stupid Miss World "competition" being held in China?

Oh sweet Jeebus. They had big controversy in 2002 when they planned to hold the "pageant" in Nigeria. 200 people were killed in riots after "a young fashion writer in Nigeria wrote that Prophet Mohammed probably would have chosen one of the Miss World contestants as his wife."

This was after they moved the contest so it wouldn't happen during Ramadan. Not making that up.

It's time for the flesh parade (oh do they offer scholarships? Oh then it's fine and don't worry about the high lead content in the crown they've always had that) to move permanently to some nice non-controversial location like Guantanamo, where Miss Teen USA and Miss USA did a meet and greet in 2005 (but not with the bad Arabs).

Worried?

Gotta love Courtney Haden in Birmingham Weekly:

I worry that cats have figured everything out.**

I worry that Dick Cheney tells Condaleezza Rice what’s in my Netflix queue.

I worry that I’m not getting enough pepperoni in my diet.

and my personal favorite:

I worry that after the paranoids take over, the amnesiacs are next.

**no one who has lived with a cat gives that one a second thought.

Saturday Song

A friend's definition of "favorite movie": You're having sex with the motel TV on (not part of my experience but I'll roll with it) and all of a sudden you realize the favorite movie is on. You tell your partner it's time to stop what you're doing and watch. Oy.

But if he has never seen Truly, Madly, Deeply...that would be the one. I'm gonna post a shorter clip because I want you to rent the whole thing if you haven't seen it. One thing I love about this clip is, it's two very intelligent creative people, obviously turned on by each other's brains, having fun together. (Nevermind one of them is dead and has come back as a ghost. Like that's a roadblock to a relationship. Please.)

Question/Open Thread on protest

Is this the best way to protest the war? I love me some Code Pink, specially their in your face activism for peace, believe me.

But I worry about creating sympathy for the lead spokesman of the bloody war criminal/PNAC'ers who run this country and who have picked a Black petite cultured manicured mouthpiece for just that reason.

Open thread on this and how can we subvert the paradigm effectively below.

Perhaps this is a little personal...

...but if you must know what kind of images give me an orgasm? This one did it for me. h/t to the lovely blog Knit Me, as in, knit me spank me do me and knit me again god oh god oh Damn Good.




The hand-dyed merino in the background would have been enough. The woman wearing this sweater calls herself Harlot, and we totally believe her. And if you don't think there's knitting in the bag she has slung over her shoulder, you don't know anything about anything, good bye.

update: here's the pattern. It's NOT fairisle it's two balls of varigated. Gawd.

An identifying theme

Picasso, Woman with a Mirror,
date not found on Google but I'd guess the 1950's

When three or more mouse clicks say the same thing in the same morning, that means way opens. Post about it.

Following one link to another I found this beautifully written memoir by "Alex," who can completely speak for himself:

My name is Alex. I guess an introduction is in order but I don't really know who I am. Actually Alex isn't really my legal name so even in my first words this starts to get a bit complicated.

I am a student, and if you ask any of my classmates who I am, you will probably hear that I am a 19-20 year old boy, well-read for my age, openly gay and that I am someone almost everybody likes but nobody knows. If you ask my mother, the picture may be somewhat different. I believe that she will tell you that I am a 27-year-old married mother of three.

Read the rest. Like all good writing it will tell you about the writer and you and humans and sorrow and joy and life and make you feel that you know more about all of that because you spent five minutes in front of a computer screen, just reading.

On the fiction front I loved the Wired essay by Lore Sjöberg, Resting in Pieces. Not sci-fi, not mere alternative history, it's more a musing on roads not taken from the standpoint of someone we would not care about, had it not been written just this way. I loved the moments I spent reading it.

And then I read a comment on another blog. I won't link though the blog deserves it aw hell it's Drifty, I'll link after all since the subsequent comments are grand and respond without troll-feeding. The commenter quoted below imho does not need encouragement. The commenter called us bloggers

"wounded birds, and the psychotically and physically maimed who need to pound it out at the keys, for some relief.

Does ANYONE who blogs not have some great personal psycho/sexual/gender adversity to overcome that I don't have to hear about?

Is there NO one out there, that's just normal?

Why sure there is, commenter, and you can find them by doing a google blog search for "kittens," "my cute baby nephew," or "cookie recipe."

One can write well about those things, but really: hold up any novel or memoir or political tract worth reading and there on the title page is a word "by" followed by the name of a wounded bird. And there in the pages is, we hope and pray, a bit of great personal psycho/sexual/gender adversity.

See, you can be an artist, hell you can be the blogosphere's Pablo Picasso. Or you can be a commenter who is looking for "normal" where staring at you through your screen is something so much better. Your choice.

I've posted this song before but it just seems so, well, apropos:

Did I forget to post today?

Did you mean birthday parties?

No, not at all. I spent the day in deep meditation, working peacefully toward Blog Post Nirvana.

BTW Happy Birthday to Mr. BG and by happenstance it's also Comrade Kevin's Birthday. Free advice Kevin: look for someone born July 16. They'll put up with you for at least ten years, which is better than anyone born today has a right to expect. Go ahead, ask Kevin Kline and his wife Phoebe Cates. Today is that Kevin's bday, too, and Phoebe and I were born the exact same day.

Getting in touch with my dirty fucking hippie.

I've been crying lately, thinking about the world as it is...

Say what you want about Cat/Yusef/wev. I was amazed at how much richer his voice is now.

Blue Gal gets cut.

Dear BlogRush. I would put this image at the top of my blogpost, but I have standards. I don't ever show a woman wearing panties at my blog because, well, I'm a prude.

Blogrush doesn't like the blog you're reading.

They emailed me the following:

We regret to inform you that your BlogRush Account has been made INACTIVE because your blog did not pass our Quality Review criteria. You will find instructions below for making your account active again.

We recently reviewed your blog(s) located at:
http://bgalrstate.blogspot.com

We determined that your blog did not meet our strict quality guidelines. Please do not take this personally but realize that we must abide by a very strict set of quality guidelines. (They are listed below.)

If you feel you have made the necessary changes to your blog(s) to meet our guidelines, you can resubmit your blog(s) for review after this date:
Wednesday, November 21, 2007

The primary reason(s) your blog(s) did not meet our guidelines:
Inappropriate Content Or Advertising:
Obscene or Disgusting

Pardon me while I laugh my ass off.

I musta been the picture of Bush and Condi. That's the only explanation.

And I totally concur that one can be obscene without showing any flesh:



You see? I showed a lot of restraint in the choice of that picture. There's a lot more flesh showing in the Abu Gahraib flickr set.

And one can be disgusting without mentioning sex. Three words: Ken Mehlman dances. (Points to commenters who tell us what dance he's doing.)



Or one can just be funny and sexual and adult and honest and still not be offensive. I think this is hilarious:



And one can always let an angry baby do the talking for you. Here you go, Blog whatever the hell your name was:



Perhaps I am unique in seeing no inconsistency between my love for Baby Jesus and my public denunciation of our current leadership as a bunch of a sociopathic fascist fucking assholes.

And so sorry, I don't think some start-up traffic increasing widget company is going to change my mind.

Skype Salon tonight 9 Eastern

and remember you don't need any special equipment. You just need to download Skype here and be able to type letters on a keyboard. Hope to see you there.

Blue Gal's Salon October 22 hosted by blue.gal.

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Vlog for October 22

No more black turtlenecks they're not video-genic, ha. See you tonight at Salon, link will be posted later.

Happy Birthday, Junior Dude

I'm running this today because for a certain newly-minted nine-year-old boy There Is Very Little Else That Matters Except We Have To Wait Nine More Days For The DVD Release. So we can watch it with the director commentary "on." No I am not making that up.



Happy Birthday my dear and only son.

Saturday Song: The Hives

Apparently the latest cream of cool band. Great vid, but I coulda done without the building exploding at the end. I mean, I like art museums. and there's too much blowing up stuff.

Whoever directed this video has attended to at least one installation fo' sho. The installers usually find one point in the project when it comes to them that, given that it's three in the morning and the installation still isn't half ready, they could instead blow the whole exhibit up with half a stick and call it "carnage art". In fact, let's dedicate this song to Morse.

Okay Youtube is giving me shit. Watch it here and sorry 'bout that.

It's a woman/man thing. We wouldn't understand.

Seeing as I'm probably already on double-secret probation from certain concerned feminist blogger's collectives... for my panties, references to titty-fucking, not to mention my occasional admiration for things George Will has said, I might as well come clean and admit the rest.









1. I love the blog Hot Chicks with Douchebags, the sole purpose of which is to deride scenes like this:



Yes he is a douchebag. And yes, from the safety and comfort of your laptop screen*, the two young women have, as the auteur of HCwDB, Douchebag 1, would say, "poetic boobies of boobage poetry."

*In other words, you don't have to attempt conversation with them about YOUR latest post quoting George Will. Do. Not. Attempt.

I can only read HDwDB about once a week. Otherwise my sides hurt too badly. And you are either like me and applaud DB1's book deal as a victory for all of us, or you think it another end of civilization as we know it. Okay.

2. I'm addicted to the morning drive show Lex and Terry. Not only is it occasionally eye-rolling sexist (Drunk Bitch Friday is particularly unfunny on the face of it, I admit) it is a, (gag) ClearChannel product. And I can't get enough.

Lex and Terry are guys. They talk sports, and I don't know what they are talking about, and I absorb the testosterone like a sponge anyway. They give love advice to men and women. (And in a great irony, they seem to assume that all of their women callers are hot chicks and their men callers are douchebags, unless proven otherwise. Women callers who clearly use men or are otherwise treating fellow human beings poorly get called on it. Men callers who claim to be in monogamous relationships are told to behave like adults. It's very refreshing.)

Sue me. I can't get all uppity about two guys whose website has a countdown clock like this:



3. I love love love certain men's magazines.

Yeah Maxim (aka the magazine for guys who can only aspire to be douchebags) stays on the magazine rack unread. But given the choice between Mother Jones and Esquire, I pick the "Women We Love" issue every. single. time. Ditto for GQ. The November issue of Esquire is typically good, and not just for its profile of Dennis and Elizabeth Kucinich (which is not online, dang it). I love their section called "The Vocabulary": "Yeatsian pounce" is reading Yeats or other like poets to "warm the cockles of both her heart and her loins." Hardly something that would impress a "hot chick" but would a "brainy chick" if you did it right. And then there's "Yoko," who is this,



But is also:

(n.) nickname for any woman who is a major force in her husband's personal and public life, significantly shaping his image and career through force of will, personality, or a whole lot of red hair. Can be added to the last name for comedic effect: "Yoko Bryant," "Yoko Kucinich."

I like new words and stuff. I also like letters sections that have the cahones to run "Context-Free Highlights from Letters We're Not Running."

All of this brings me to two life experiences. I remember in 9th grade thinking I would go to Smith College (I was a legacy, my paternal grandmother was class of '20 and great aunt somewhere around there, too.) By tenth grade I realized that every friend I had was a boy. I didn't talk to girls at school very much at all. Ever. I did not apply to Smith.

I also remember when the National Museum of Women in the Arts opened several years ago. My mother, an artist and a fine one her own self, said she would not want to be included in such a project. She called it a ghetto.

Not gonna separate ourselves from the menfolk, is what it means. Take it, Patty Loveless:



There are lots of women's writing essays about male language power versus female language power. Ursula K. LeGuin's Bryn Mawr commencement address in 1986 is a classic example.

You came here to college to learn the language of power - to be empowered. If you want to succeed in business, government, law, engineering, science, education, the media, if you want to succeed, you have to be fluent in the language in which "success" is a meaningful word. ...

Is that what this is about though? That good funny writing based on politics and social commentary must somehow come from dominant paradigm (meaning male) language?

I don't think that's it.

It's true, dear reader, I do not know exactly where this essay is going, but I don't want it to turn into a 1980's graduate school paper: Blogs, Boobs, Brains and Bravery: Humor and Gender in Early 21st Century Electronic Media. Don't make me write what I wouldn't want to read. No, this essay is all about ME.

And yet someone (okay yeah a guy) told me recently that the appeal of my blog to male readers is that many men can't talk politics with their girlfriends and I'm a surrogate. Oh really?



I've been working on this post for about three days and as one friend told me, "Leonardo said art is never finished, only abandoned." So here. We'll continue this conversation in comments.

So we love this.

Jezebel (of course) (and tip of something tasty to baabaabaab for sending it to me xo)

Activists are sending women's underwear to the Burmese junta responsible for killing all those monks because, among other retarded things, the dictatorship believes touching a woman's panties will "make them lose their power."

Bwa ha ha.

RIP Deborah Kerr

She was proof positive that classy could be teh hott. And of course, her passing is a good excuse to run this one. "Nobody ever sent me the way you do." Dang, Girl.

Leave it to Dennis!

Best. Vid. Evah.

Go say Hi

Not another....MONKEY!

Monkey has now officially taken over from "vixen" as the most used blogger identity.

Anyhow....

Go say hi to Powder Monkey at Only Sayin', the latest edition to the BG blogroll.

I poke fun at Netroots Nation knowing full well I wanna go next summer.

"You know you got it...

...if it makes you feel good." (Feel good music for a feelin' good Wednesday.)

A very special video message...

To two very special entities:

1. The Chinese Government, who took time out from ignoring lead contamination on their exported Happy Meal toys and Boy Scout paraphernalia to complain that the Dalai Lama is visiting The White House.

2. The White House, which is "downplaying" the visit.

Because I don't suppose his holiness the Dalai Lama will do so his own self, on his behalf and in the name of my country I am following the instructions on this video to the letter:

What it's like.

If you were there last night, you know. I just sat there and glowed at all the brains. Mmm. Brains.

Salon Link...hey you probably won't be blogging.

Blue Gal's Salon October 15 hosted by blue.gal.

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Blogger is gonna have a "scheduled outage" at 4 Pacific, they say. I remember the good old days when unscheduled outages happened every five minutes! We blogged barefoot in two feet of snow and were grateful to be able to download an occasional .gif image of a thinner, blonder Britney that we would mash with Windows Paint to a picture of John Ashcroft letting his eagle soar. I'm telling you, kids today don't know blogging like we blogged.

Sigh. At 6 Pacific 9 Eastern and do the math in between we have Skype Salon. Please join us it doesn't take Skype equipment, you just need to download Skype here and click the box above. Hope to see you there.

Blue Gal Vlog 10/15. 17:00? or 00:17? Take your pick.

This is seventeen minutes and directed at my fellow bloggers. Ignore at will.



But I saved the money shot for a separate vid. Seventeen seconds where I eat the sweet berry. Ha. Knock yourselves out, boys.



Salon tonight links later. xo

Caption this photo

Because seriously, when I turned on NPR at 8 this morning and the first words outta Nora Raum's** mouth were "Condoleeza Rice" I knew I could turn the radio off with impunity. The rest of the day's decisions should be so easy.

Nora Raum reads news for NPR part-time and is a bankruptcy lawyer the rest of the day. She clearly accomplishes more in a day than the Secretary of State. Just saying.

Saturday Song

My definition of old? This was 24 years ago. I remember when it was actually edgy to listen to them. I still. love. this.



So. Central Rain ("a song too new to be named") from the same appearance.

What every Blue Gal needs....

I wish my inbox had a nice pair of satiny knickers but instead it was just another article giving me a reason why I should hate Joe Lieberman. Got plenty of those, thanks.

Today's gonna be way busy....

I'm putting on Nicole Belle's apron (hyuh like I don't have my own...layering?) and tending to the C&L kitchen today. Nice about Al Gore. Have a good one.

Hey at least she's not a flag lapel pin.

One more post about Elizabeth Kucinich and then I'm gonna stfu and stick to the issues. Here's a little exercise for you:

Go to a used clothing store in Greater Cleveland, Ohio.

Try something on.

Look like this.

Then sit and wonder why the media likes her.

But Roger Ailes is right and Howie Kurtz is full of it. Which is as media insider as I EVER wanna get.

This article says the cameras are all for her, too.

Democratic frontrunner forgets that even small children have an attention span

because of this.

I wonder if you can buy this in Alabama? ***

...'cause apparently we need 'em for our Baptist ministers.

No fewer than three fellow bloggers sent me the story about the Alabama Baptist minister who died, alone and at home, with a condom-covered, well, appendage in his nether regions while wearing two wetsuits.

Poor bastard.

I replied to all of them that if this story had not broken yet I wouldn't run it. The guy is not an elected official, and I don't care if he used to work for Falwell he didn't at the time of this incident. If he had been an elected official, even if he did not make any stand on gay rights, then all bets are off and he gets it up the butt again more ways than one.

It also makes a difference that he was in the privacy of his own home and that now he's dead. If he was merely arrested and/or doing this in public or sumpin' that is also fair play.

We liberals are all about "live and let live" and "do what feels good" unless it involves hypocrisy from fundy types. But let's face it, this guy had a seriously funky fetish and he kept it to himself. Wetsuits are expensive and he needed two. And apparently he couldn't tell his wife or anyone else so he'd have a little safety buddy to watch for signs he was getting into trouble and to get him out afterwards.

Poor bastard.

On the other hand, did you hear about the other Baptist minister who was arrested after he...

publically urinated....
at an outdoor car wash...
while wearing a skirt...
in front of several children...
and apparently when the police arrived...
he offered the men in blue...
the oral sex.

The police spokesman said, in a moment of demure understatement and passive-tense reserve, that "alcohol was involved."

There was apparently a bottle of Oxy pills in his car as well. I wonder if his car radio was tuned to Rush? Now see, if I found out that Rush Limbaugh had even LOOKED at a rubberized diving suit while whoring it up in Cancun...see the difference? See?

Back for a minute to the arrested pee-pee skirt minister: that guy deserves to have his name, Tommy Tester, (oh now you know I couldn't make that one up) and picture pasted all over the internet tubes. It's all a matter of journalistic standard practices, people.

***I mus' say I'm surprised what you can get at Cafepress.

Vlog on well-meaning conservatives

I also want to take this opportunity to say happy birthday to my stepdaughter VEL, who is furthering the family's reputation as intellectual lightweights by getting her Ph.D. in Medieval Literature from Cambridge University, England. Have a birthday as lovely as you, dear.

Perspective.

 

This has been on my fridge for so long I can't remember what year it is. Speedbump is online but they don't have this one in the archive it's too old.

Salon Link and happy birthday Special K

I totally forgot today was Dennis Kucinich's birthday. Okay, I'm a baaad commie. Hope to see you at salon and if you are a blogger and have an October birthday let us know in comments and I'll do some kinda panties cake thing later this week.

Blue Gal's Salon October 8 hosted by blue.gal.

Join now

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Chat about what's on your mind. More about public chats.

Video blog is delayed one day...

Because I have kids at home, but Skype salon is on for tonight. We'll all be singing Drifty's version of Tradition so be sure to print it out like I did. (Kidding. Salon is typing only, not singing.)

I'll have the Skype Salon link up later in the day. 8 Central time we'll type chat for an hour or so. Please join us.

I made this graphic for Crooks today but another author had posted a story on Joey DiFatta, so I'll just have to save it for the next pro-family values GOP homo bathroom scandal. Oh well.

Go say Hi

To Darkblack. We like, and when we like, we blogroll.

The wives of the candidates - The Barbie Doll Edition

One thing I really hate about press coverage of the candidate's wives is the sense that they are so often treated in the media like Barbie dolls rather than actual women. Then I just decided to go with it.

Geri Thompson Barbie: Google image search brings up 177,000 Barbies matching the description of Jeri Thompson. I picked this one because I didn't have to re-size it.

Fred Thompson's first lady herself is quoted in a recent AP article: Mrs. Thompson said, "I almost think they had to fabricate that trophy-wife stuff because there's nothing interesting to say."

Wow, that's really interesting.

Elizabeth Kucinich Barbie: comes with a Bachelor's degree in Religious Studies and Theology and a Master's degree in International Conflict Analysis from the University of Kent, along with a vegan Whole Foods shopping bag.

Mrs. Kucinich's tongue stud (sheeeeeeeit the f-ing revenge of the nerd just. never. stops!) is not included.





Judith Giuliani Barbie: as shown.

Saturday Songs (for us girls and those who love us)

Meryn Cadell. Her classic 1992 album, Angel Food for Thought, went up recently at iTunes. Laa.



And this morning found this one under my pillow. ha. They kinda go together. The late Kirsty MacColl:

Technical Questions from other bloggers. Can you help?

Email inquirer number one asks:

Curious technical question. Technocrati has been showing us on the ping page as not having been updated in 24 days, yet it will pull up the current pieces. I thought this might be happening to all Blogger 2.0 accounts. Any insight?

My response:

IMHO Technorati is fucked up. Constantly. My pings are never accurate, etc. Links will appear days after I've seen the traffic come in on Statcounter. I'll post something on this this morning and see what others think.


Email inquirer number two:

Is switching from Blogger to Wordpress and is having a challenge getting a decent statcounter on the site. If a Wordpress guru wants to help with this, let me know. bluegalsblog AT gmail DOT com. I'll send on your email. Thanks.

We execute Quakers, don't we?

While the corporate media wraps their little brain around the fact that our Justice Department is pro-torture, Fresh Air has a great excerpt from Garry Will's new book, describing the events leading up to the Massachusetts execution of Mary Dyer, Quaker, in 1660.

And the interview at the same link is the clearest historical argument for separation of Church and State I've ever heard.

Some things are just too much, even for this blog.

I may run a picture of a hot dog thong, but I will not, not, not, run pictures of Larry Craig's Super Tuber, his favorite recipe involving a hot dog and a baked potato.

And he calls it a "snack." Really, Larry.

But I will link to the images as a courtesy to my readers.

Warning: microwaved hot dogs tend to explode at the tip if you leave them in too long. Probably better to roast them outdoors.

Which begs the question: do you dip the hot dog in the sour cream before or after you shove it in the baked potato?

Why did I even start thinking about this? Really.

Oh my f-ing God.

This is the leader of the free world. h/t Driftglass. I'm not just going for the free cupcake:

[President Bush] offered a pointed description of his job.

"My job is a decision-making job. And as a result, I make a lot of decisions," the president said.

He elaborated on that point later.

"I delegate to good people. I always tell Condi Rice, `I want to remind you, Madam Secretary, who has the Ph.D. and who was the C student. And I want to remind you who the adviser is and who the president is.'

"I got a lot of Ph.D.-types and smart people around me who come into the Oval Office and say, `Mr. President, here's what's on my mind.' And I listen carefully to their advice. But having gathered the device (sic), I decide, you know, I say, `This is what we're going to do.' And it's `Yes, sir, Mr. President.' And then we get after it, implement policy."

Please, let's find a way to replace this man with a more intelligent and more eloquent leader. Using that alone as the standard for selection, I nominate this person:



You know, all of the jokes are old now. I'm not really laughing anymore. Gimme that cupcake.

Don't piss I mean, spit, into the wind...

There are certain rules in life it only makes sense to follow.



And giving a small dig to a big box blogger, one of the biggest, for one post, certainly seems like an exercise in getting self-induced urine stains on your own clothing.

So I won't link or get any attention for this one, but I mus' say:

DANG I love this.

For my daughters.

You have probably seen this and yeah, it's an AD. But for once I think the message transcends the sales pitch and dang if I don't endorse this message. A. and A., this one is for you, my beautiful, beautiful, girls. [And I particularly endorse my daughters' current sense of what "gorgeous" is.]:

It was only a matter of time....

...before "Tancredo Girl" went viral on YouTube.

She's profiled here, if you missed it.

"Officially" back together.

He had me at "I'm gonna put Dennis Kucinich on notice and have him on my show."

Salon tonight 9 Eastern

Only requires that you download Skype, which appears to be bug, spam, and spyware free. (We've checked.) Download here.

Everything else is just typing. You don't need a headset or any skype certified equipment to participate.

Blue Gal's Salon October 1 hosted by blue.gal.

Join now

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Chat about what's on your mind. More about public chats.

Blue Gal Vlog 10/1

Yeah yeah file this one under "fourteen minutes of your life you'll never have again" and you won't be interested at all unless you're into

a. the knitting creative process,
b. my seamstress brain's reaction to Silence of the Lambs, or
c. what kind of bras I wear.

Salon tonight I'll have the link up later as usual. xoxo

UPDATE: If you think I'm making up this whole knit the bra cup thang I'm serious. Make your own bra online tutorial is here.

Crocheted thong and knit bra from Interweave Knits magazine, Spring 2007.

Ugliest hand-knit bra evah, but they do provide a pattern, ick, is here.

Great examples of what "fair isle" looks like in sweaters, here.

Up yours for stealing my thunder, Wapo.